Learn how to deal with someone who is bipolar and angry with strategies rooted in empathy.
Dealing with intense emotions from someone you care about can feel overwhelming, especially when bipolar disorder is involved. Understanding how to deal with someone who is bipolar and angry requires a combination of patience, knowledge, and practical strategies tailored to their unique needs.
How to Deal with Someone Who Is Bipolar and Angry?
Dealing with someone who is bipolar and angry requires empathy, clear communication, and practical strategies.
Bipolar disorder is a complex mental health condition that includes intense mood swings, ranging from manic highs to depressive lows.
Anger can surface during manic or depressive episodes, often causing distress to the individual and those around them.
1. Understand Bipolar Disorder and Its Triggers
To effectively respond, you need to understand what bipolar disorder entails. People with bipolar disorder experience mood episodes that affect their behavior, energy, and emotions.
Anger may arise as a symptom of these episodes or as a reaction to stressors.
Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison, a renowned psychologist specializing in bipolar disorder, writes in An Unquiet Mind, “Understanding the patterns of mood fluctuations in someone with bipolar disorder can prevent unnecessary emotional reactions to their anger. It’s not personal—it’s symptomatic.”
2. Create a Safe Environment
When someone with bipolar disorder is angry, safety should be your priority—for both of you. Their anger is not always directed at you but could stem from inner turmoil.
Provide a calm, non-confrontational space where they can process their emotions.
How This Helps: A safe space reduces the likelihood of escalating the situation. Instead of arguing or matching their intensity, your calm demeanor can help diffuse tension.
3. Use Clear, Non-Judgmental Communication
Choose your words carefully when dealing with someone in an angry state. Avoid accusations or statements that might make them feel cornered.
Focus on “I” statements that express your feelings without assigning blame.
Instead of saying, “You’re always losing your temper,” say, “I feel hurt when conversations turn heated, and I’d like us to talk calmly.”
4. Set Boundaries Without Guilt
While empathy is crucial, it’s equally important to establish boundaries. Let them know certain behaviors are unacceptable while reinforcing your support for their well-being.
Calmly say, “I understand you’re upset, but yelling isn’t something I’m comfortable with. Let’s revisit this when we can both talk calmly.”
Clear boundaries prevent you from feeling overwhelmed while ensuring they know you care about their feelings, not just their behavior.
5. Recognize the Role of Medication and Therapy
Anger in bipolar disorder is often linked to mood episodes that may require professional intervention.
Ensure the individual is receiving proper medical care, as medication and therapy play significant roles in managing bipolar symptoms.
6. Practice Active Listening
When someone with bipolar disorder is angry, they often want to feel heard and understood. Resist the urge to interrupt or defend yourself. Instead, listen attentively and acknowledge their feelings.
Use phrases like, “I hear that you’re frustrated about what happened,” or “It sounds like this has been really difficult for you.”
Feeling validated can significantly reduce their anger. By showing them they are understood, you foster trust and create an opportunity for calm dialogue.
7. Avoid Triggering Situations
Some situations or topics may exacerbate anger in someone with bipolar disorder. Identify these triggers and take proactive steps to avoid or manage them.
8. Encourage Healthy Outlets for Anger
Bipolar-related anger can often be channeled into constructive activities. Encourage the person to adopt habits that promote emotional regulation, such as physical exercise, journaling, or mindfulness practices.
Physical activities release pent-up energy, while mindfulness fosters greater control over emotional responses.
9. Avoid Personalizing Their Anger
It’s easy to feel hurt or defensive when someone directs anger at you, but remember that their emotions are influenced by their condition, not by who you are.
If a family member snaps at you for a small mistake, remind yourself, “This reaction is about their current mood, not me.”
10. Educate Yourself About Bipolar Disorder
Knowledge is power. The more you understand bipolar disorder, the better equipped you’ll be to handle its challenges.
Books like Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder by Julie Fast and John Preston offer actionable strategies for partners and family members.
11. Take Care of Your Own Mental Health
Supporting someone with bipolar disorder can be emotionally taxing. Ensure you have your own coping mechanisms and support system in place.
Maintaining your emotional well-being ensures you can be a stable, supportive presence for your loved one.
12. Recognize Warning Signs of Escalation
Sometimes, anger can escalate into more serious situations. Be vigilant about warning signs such as physical aggression or threats, and don’t hesitate to seek professional help or involve authorities if necessary.
If their anger becomes unmanageable, call a mental health crisis hotline or their therapist immediately.
13. Be Patient and Hopeful
Dealing with someone who has bipolar disorder and anger issues is not easy, but patience and a long-term perspective are key. Celebrate small victories and encourage their progress.
Positive reinforcement motivates continued improvement and strengthens your relationship.
So, how to deal with someone who is bipolar and angry? Simple! By implementing these strategies with compassion and confidence.
